Sure, New Moon has been out for weeks now but we at the Bad Moms Club only got around to seeing it this past Saturday (in IMAX no less, which for the record makes both Teams look divine).
Know why it took us so long? Because arranging a babysitter for all of our offspring at the same time is task only slightly less challenging than co-ordinating the appearances of Team Brangelina and Team Aniston on the red carpet. In fact, I'd venture that Brangelaniston-wrangling might be easier than finding suckers to take care of our kids.
Get it? Suckers?
Vampire jokes. SO EASY.
(Wanna know what else was a joke? Jacob's hair extensions. The relief I felt when he ditched those was like having a great big Hair by Jessica Simpson weight lifted off my chest.)
ANYWAY. For all the fans and haters of the Twilight phenomenon, I present the crib notes of the movie New Moon...
First, some good reasons to see it on the big screen, both self-explanatory:
Second: two very good recaps that you might call parodies but as a lover-hater of the entire series (love it because duh: Edward and all that sexual tension without sex | hate it because ick: Bella sucks, writing painful, and New Moon was a pain in the a*s to slog through) (ed. note: BELLA DOES NOT SUCK.) (ed. note: NO PUN INTENDED.) I found these both highly entertaining and unfortunately, at times accurate. Commence the lip chewing!
And what better way to watch a film than when it is a parody done by puppets?
I have to end this with saying that there is a dent in my Team Edward armour. Mostly made by a certain werewolf named Embry. Rawrr.
Screw the haters, this mom likes to have fun.