These boobs, the ones that she had on display at the Golden Globes the other night?
Yeah. Those? Are CRIMINAL. Those SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED.
The picture doesn't do them justice. I actually gasped when she walked onstage. Where was one to look? IT WAS ALL BOOB. SHIMMERING, PERKY BOOB.
Of course, I'm happy for her. Moms gotta represent, right? But seriously, is it wrong that I'm kinda hoping there was some magic double-sided tape involved and that body make-up and good lighting really can do wonders for one's assets?
Because, damn. My boob esteem is suffering a little today.