The Bad Moms Club

From The WTF Files: Woman Charged After Squirting Breast Milk On Deputy

This story has WTF written all over it, so I’m going to skip the preamble and dive right in: a 31-year old woman from Kentucky is facing assault charges after squirting a police officer in the face with breast milk.

Yup, you read that right. Breast milk.

From The WTF Files: Michael Jackson’s Nephew Buys Stun Gun Online

Things recently took a turn for the crazy in the Jackson household after thirteen-year-old Jafar, one of Jermaine Jackson’s eight children, reportedly bought a stun gun off the Internet. Word on the wire was that he used his cousin Prince Michael, a.k.a. Blanket, as a target.

It’s a news story that really brings the WTF’s.

Harriet The Spy Ditches Pen And Notebook, Opts For Laptop And Blog

First came Harriet the Spy, Louise Fitzhugh’s classic, award-winning story about Harriet M. Welsch, an 11-year old aspiring writer who doesn’t leave home without a pen and her notebook. Thirty-two years later, Nickelodeon took a stab at a remake, a movie that starred Michelle Trachtenberg as Harriet. It's one that, I admit, I’ve never seen, but from what I’ve read it sounds like Nick did stay in line with quite a bit of the original plot.

Well, now the Disney Channel is premiering their new Harriet the Spy remake next month, and it's called Harriet the Spy: Blog Wars. That's right, folks: in this version, our beloved Harriet has pitched her trusty pen and notepad in favour of a laptop and and a blog.

Bad Moms Know A Bad Thing When They Hear It

I’m not afraid to admit that I used to consider myself one of the world’s biggest Poison fans, and that, for a long time, I found the band’s frontman, Bret Michaels, quite desirable. But sometime late last decade (which, not so coincidentally, is when Rock of Love made its big debut) I stopped seeing Bret as the rugged rock n' roll crooner I wouldn't kick out of bed and started thinking of things like male pattern baldness, venereal disease, male sluts, and one-hit wonders whenever I heard his name.

The 47-year old rocker is in the headlines again – and no, this time it’s not because he’s driving a Winnebago across the United States in search of his long lost rock mama, thank gawd. This time, it’s about music. Bret’s been busy in the studio, you see, recording a hot new single with none other than... Miley Cyrus.

Canadian Teachers Redefine School Spirit, And Not In A Good Way

In the arena of people that I always think of as asexual, possibly even neutered, teachers rank right up there with grandparents and clergy. I mean, I know that they're human, but still. When I was in high school, the idea of my math teacher dating was inconceivable. He just went home every night and read calculus textbooks, right? Right?

He certainly didn't know his way around a lap dance, I'm pretty sure about that. Not like the teachers at Churchill High School in Winnipeg, Manitoba.

Bad Moms Don't Judge But Some Other People Sure Do

When Gemma was about five days old, we were in the grocery store when an old lady went crazy on me and gave me the first stranger inflicted assvice / verbal dressing-down episodes of my parenting career.

Here I was, barely standing and using the stroller as a crutch for my poor embattled nethers with an old lady yelling at me -- loudly -- that I should never, ever let my child cry 'you MUST pick her up all the time. A good mum picks up her child all the time.' For the record, Gemma had just let out one of those wonderful little baby bird squawks before returning to her slumber and that was the 'crying' I was being reprimanded for. Old lady made this hormonal new mom cry. Hard.

Are Schools Trying To Make Students Hate Educational Institutions? Because It Sure Looks That Way.

Last week I was exploding over the incredible overreaction of one school principal who made a nine-year old boy cry while threatening him with suspension because he was carrying a two-inch long LEGO gun at school. In my opinion, that principal took the zero-tolerance gun policy to the extreme and now it appears she has brethren in art of overreaction at other schools.

Alexa Gomez, age twelve, doodled on her desk with erasable pen and was hauled out of school to the police station in handcuffs for her offence.

HANDCUFFED. TO A POLICE STATION.

If The Toy Description Has The Words 'Russian Roulette' In It? Automatic Fail

Before I read the description I was working under the assumption that this toy was just a massive translation c*ck-up or something.

But I don't really see how someone misinterpreted 'Russian Roulette' since the description sounds pretty much in tune with the definition for that particular method of death. All I really know about this toy is: TOY FAIL.

Should The Zero Tolerance In School Gun Policy Mean Exactly That?

A nine-year-old boy was almost suspended from school over a small toy gun -- like the one in the image to the left -- because the school has a zero tolerance gun policy.

No one really thinks that this toy is really a gun, right?

So the boy was threatened with a school suspension in order to scare him into not packing anything larger, or perhaps more lead-filled, upon his return? Because maybe this kind of reaction could be the first step to driving him to do just that.

Banning The Dictionary In School: One Step Forward For Idiots, One Giant Leap Backwards For Childkind

I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried: Schools in Menifee Union school district in Southern California are banning the dictionary, Merriam Webster's 10th edition, from the grade four and five classrooms because (brace yourself) the kids are looking up dirty words.

THE HORROR.