Bad Moms Know A Bad Thing When They Hear It

I’m not afraid to admit that I used to consider myself one of the world’s biggest Poison fans, and that, for a long time, I found the band’s frontman, Bret Michaels, quite desirable. But sometime late last decade (which, not so coincidentally, is when Rock of Love made its big debut) I stopped seeing Bret as the rugged rock n' roll crooner I wouldn't kick out of bed and started thinking of things like male pattern baldness, venereal disease, male sluts, and one-hit wonders whenever I heard his name.

The 47-year old rocker is in the headlines again – and no, this time it’s not because he’s driving a Winnebago across the United States in search of his long lost rock mama, thank gawd. This time, it’s about music. Bret’s been busy in the studio, you see, recording a hot new single with none other than... Miley Cyrus.

When I first heard about this collaboration, there was a part of me that wanted to believe that the resulting duet wouldn't smack of creepiness. I wanted to give the song the benefit of the doubt – maybe it would be PG, a little ditty about sunshine, lollipops and sparkly unicorns. I mean, Miley is, after all, only seventeen years old. Right?

Right. And wrong. Yes, Miley is all of seventeen, but there ain't no sunshine in this song. Called Nothing to Lose, it’s a power ballad about two desperate lovers who, despite all efforts to resist each other, ultimately give in to their burning desires:

Won't you fall down on me / So close I can feel you breathe / Tonight in the darkness with nothing to lose / If the truth is all we can see / If I fall for you, could you fall for me?

There’s nothing wrong with the fact that Bret and Miley have teamed up to record music together. It is, of course, the song’s lyrics that ramp up the creepiness factor. When Bret Michaels croons with Miley Cyrus about her falling down on him, so close he can feel her breathe, it conjures up feelings of ick, and ew, and CREEPY. And it’s got me wondering, again. Where the youknowwhat are this girl's freakin’ PARENTS?

Miley Cyrus is many things. She’s talented, successful and very pretty, but what she’s not is an adult. She’s seventeen, for corn’s sake; she’s a young girl who still needs the guidance and direction of her mother and father, the folks who are supposed to step in and say You know, maybe an oversexed duet with Bret Michaels isn’t such a good idea after all, sweetie. It’s clear that Billy Ray and his wife have turned the Cyrus family in to one big marketing machine, and while that is their choice, the machine they’ve created has produced a nine-year-old girl who asks the world to SMACK THAT, and a seventeen-year-old girl who’s set to release a single about a steamy love affair with worn-out rocker thirty years her senior. Looking at the Cyrus girls, it’s hard not to think that this finely-tuned marketing machine is little bit broken.

[source]

Comments

[Michelle]

That is just SAD.

[PrincessJenn]

Uh...yeah.. ewwww

[Howie Montgomery]

Well, he was the second choice after someone pointed out that it was even creepier when she sang it with Billy Ray. ;)

[Stephanie Stearns Dulli]

Oh good Christmas. This is so disturbing. And gross. Grossly distrurbingly and yes, eleventh billion kinds of wrong. Man, I'm an artists
and I gotta tell you...I would NEVER let me kid do hist like this. No way.

[Musings of a Housewife]

This really just makes me sad. And also, I have a very impressionable 7-year-old girl who thinks Miley Cyrus walks on water. And knows the words to all her songs. Obviously this song will not make my iPod, but I am just very disappointed b/c I had been hoping Miley might be the exception to the hollywood-child-star-train-wreck rule.

[Babybloomr]

I HAVE a 17 year old daughter, and the thought of a leering Brett Michaels anywhere near her makes me want to do a preemptive Silkwood-type scrub-down on her. And my brain. (Although she has mentioned that she DOES think Springsteen is 'hot', but come on-- she's a teenager, she's not dead!)

Honestly? This duet and the younger sister's sluttastic clothing line are irrefutable proof that the parents are either so jaded by Hollywood that they don't see the obvious risks, or they are so hungry for fame even once-removed that they are willing to sell their children for it. These girls are MINORS-- their lack of judgement is understandable, but their 'decisions' have to be facilitated by the adults around them. I'd love to hear anyone try to make a case that these choices are in any way in their children's best interest.

[Leahpeah]

You know what? I just threw up. It's not even a very good song but the ick factor is WAY UP THERE.

[Wicked SteppMom]

I'm so unbelievably creeped out by this. I actually saw Bret Michaels (w/Poison) in concert when I was in high school in 1990, when I was 14...I'm 34 now & have a 5 yo daughter that worships Hannah/Miley. ick-Ick-ICK!! I can't even bring myself to watch the video, since the picture that's displayed just looks like a pedophile & a wh*re.

[MFA Mama]

I just threw up in my mouth a little. True story. Thanks for that.

[Neen]

I was right with you on crushing on Brett Michaels 20 years ago.
When his truly disturbing reality show was on for the first time one of my teenagers called me in the room to see it. I watched for a few minutes and said "Oh, crap, he turned into *that guy*", what guy, "The pathetic creepy old guy who thinks the young girls are after him 'cause he's still HAWT, not because he's famous, or rich." "Oh, okay, that's what I thought." I asked if he was going to keep watching it, "Only if you want too,", "God, no!", "Good, Mythbusters is on."

Myley Cyrus? Ewwww.... Dude, the reality show proves your desperate, you don't have to go that far.

[b*babbler]

Hmm.. remember those photos Annie Leibowitz took of her, that got everyone up in arms, and Vanity Fair sort of apologized for, even though the ones of her with her dad were far creepier and he was there the whole time approving the images as they were shot?

Um, yeah. Wonder who's going to be left holding the bag for this little stunt. 'Cause that's how the Cyrus family seems to work. Pimp your daughter out, then have someone else apologize when the world says "hey, wait a minute".

It's enough to make me sick.

[Dawn @ Coming to a Nursery Near You]

Ok, seriously - ew. Not only the age difference - but just the whole thing. She's been overly exposed - in more ways than one - for years now - and just. EW.

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